it was so beautiful and wonderful and... just ineffable. how do you detail the feelings of being with the most caring, fun, wonderful people you know in idyllic settings filled with perfect imperfections -- how do you describe it well enough so you remember everything.

i'm not sure, but i'll try:

late night photos black and white dresses pearls and gold and dressed up in eckerds whistles foot on pedal smiling racing driving different area codes down blue road valet parking black silk sweaters drapped over black and white smiles smiles dancing on chairs and tables and michael, finding out later the refusal brought glasses of water {you're all wet}, "the sixteen yr old hottie...i could hook it up but your parents might get mad and it would be a mess," salsa dancing and lisa and katey and julie and congo lines with quick steps meg leads gorgeous gorgeous wedding dress and the smile never left her face college guys & sixty year olds, dancing around the room and on the chairs with lisa, 'dont leave me katie,' natalie the one that loves you, being told too many times about beauty and dresses and natural everything, delicious wedding cake, newyorknewyork kicking up heels and smiling at him from the dance floor smiling because its okay to be shy smiling because its okay to be me, to just be. smiling because ive never been comfortable like this.

sunday morning brunches hugs hugs hugs times infinity -- they never stopped. laughing at the pictures we developed in the early morning, 'what are you doing there kate, praising the lord?', hearing about the wedding night with rose petals and wine, plane trips to capri, mmm bagels, playing with tommy and patrick swinging on the rope swing the way they share, tell me when you want to come down; okay, down; heyyy lets show dad; i'm as high as a monkey!, hugs from the cutest kids ever.

frosty flakes & potatoes, golf the card game around a cozy circle of friends and smiles, jokes and laughter. the design channel, chocolate cake, hamburgers, sharing seats.

hugs from warm sweatshirts and a warm boy. tears spilling as i know they are the thirty eight steps it takes from my house to theirs but that when i come home, they wont be there. that id rather them not be on a plane right now. crying listening to hands down because this was hands down the best weekend. when you tell me to think of the happy things, it only makes me cry harder because it was so, so happy.

this was good for me.


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