in the middle [school]
01.31.03back&
forth
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there.s this boy that used to hate me and i used to not like him very much at all in any way, because he was big and ugly and mean. mostly the mean bit. everyone hated him too. in english class he used to try and threaten me and the whole class would start yelling at him and go ballistic. i just found a note from sixth grade where people told me that he liked me ///? and that.s why he was so mean. we didn.t speak for the next three years. and now he.s in my english class. and he looks me in the face when i argue with the teacher or the novelist, when i politely point out the poignant differences between a and b, and the c that you.re trying to tell us is absolute truth. he looks me straight in the face when i can fire back as much about politics as he can, but firing isn.t quite the word because you have to remember, this is me. this is me but i know when i know what i.m saying, this is me but you don.t know me all too well, remember. so it.s when i can be calm and explain that the panama canal and the us's handling of it isn.t quite like you.re implying and debate milton's idea versus genesis/// open and close holes in arguments. and then he looks me in the face and gives me this look. and one day the look said, you.ve got me pinned, you.ve got me. ok, you.re right. you.re right. and he.s still big but no longer so mangled with defense tactics, and ugly.s not really a word about people more about attitudes, and he.s no longer so mean. and so the other day i thought of this and wrote it all down and it.s just one of those things that makes you think about burning bridges. at least that.s what that look tells me.
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