invincible II

09.03.02back& forth
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Today I laughed so.hard. until I cried [best feeling], watched the figure eight stage lights flicker [I used to think it was for me] and then them flirting, holding hands, smiling at each other. Believe me [and I finally believe myself] it/s Over [fucking funny because it never even started. So angry.] I was washing my hands and she came in the bathroom and it kindof shocked me a little, I don�t know. She said hey and I said hi and got the hell out of there in the most nonchalant I have to get to class way. in spite of all this, all this silence i/m getting and all the words they/re and she and i/m telling me, I still want to make a mix cd and send him sheets and sheets and sheets of blank paper [stupid inside joke], leave it at his door. You died today. I listened to a girl I used to love tell me how she partied with all the people i/ve grown apart from [I decided a while back that they are just Bad for me] and all the good people I miss like hell. She grew up [into herself]; where the fuck was I? Oh yeah. Trying to be like the old her. But i/m not that kind of passive [or any], I just like being quiet more now, and it/s not the words of our enemies but the silences of our friends�� darling, i/ll never forget your silence.


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