(A text today: “Yes! I like it a lot. It reminds me sleater kinney/Le Tigre + even more pop vibes. Definitely havent been sing/screaming her songs in the car like i would when i was 15 despite my happy marriage; sometimes Dan joins my sing a long and then comments wow this song is sad (deja vu). Yes, just how I like them. What is life without sad songs.”)

What IS life without beautiful sad songs.
Today I looked longingly at a book of poetry, then analyzed employee profit share language. Read a lot of emails while dancing to bacilos while it rained.

**

A super old joke/ I’m a car and I can park whereeeeever I want. // Silly:
Cars don’t have phones.
Off to sleep, to a friends episode to bore me into slumber them back to corporate America, mice clicking, keyboards tapping, 401k and Roth, forever and ever amen.

Lately/ so I don’t goldfish it all away later
Frozen shoulder is thawing. Empty DC winter walks.
Vaccine reaction so severe i had to go to the ER, couldn’t walk or think straight for 3 weeks. Walking well now and back to my resting bitch face, on 100 State, to everyone’s great relief. There is a true nightmare being trapped in your body and knowing it. Followed up with every dr I’ve seen for the last 10 years.
Crying as we got our Fauci ouchies - the phrase “our long national nightmare is over” which has a millions applications and maybe isn’t quite true, but I’m feeling a lot better about hugging my dad - that i won’t kill him.
Inside game night with our favorites - party of literally 4.
Less anxiety just walking outside.
Still never telling anyone anything….

¯_(ツ)_/¯ you’re inner circle or you’re someone i used to know. A reason, a season. A handful are in that lifetime category so far and that’s just because I’m older every day.

A reason, a season. And I love you for that, I am sure. It is always a delight to hear from old friends. You can’t make old friends. If i told you my secrets, let you read my writing, left you notes, made you a playlist, wrote you a letter, IM’d you (! who can remember away messages and curated quotes and fonts)- any if the above - we are friends in space and time always. So, if that’s you - email me, it’s a delight.

I’m still me: writing, listening to music, inviting you to the library and the party, to come home with me and lay on our backs and just be. dance our faces off at a show, get late night food, walk everywhere. skinny dipping and debutante balls. I’m at home on a beach at the edge of the world or the four seasons in any city. You could have met me anytime, you know, and somewhere, I’ll always be me (and I’ll never be that same me.) This is some drunk on needing sleep writing if ever there was. But you knew that.

Wishing you good health & joy ahead.
(Good talk. See you out there.)

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