here's a piece of news (to me, too): my life revolves around one thing, basically. the persuit of knowledge slash the aggressive drive to get into the college i love (whichever one that happens to be). which, okay, does include all those things. it includes acting perfect and being perfect and doing everything religiously and with passion.

ive been doing that for fifteen years and im fucking tired of it.

and yet, this yr, i dont get that feeling that my teachers think of me as the perfect student, the model, the person to run the class. and i dont like it one bit. this hole is dug.

so yeah, aggressive, dears.

i basically want to kick ass at everything i do. which includes school & waterpolo & volunteering & friends everything.

so i guess im learning who i am & "finding myself" & that bullshit (sit back as i make fun of myself).

i was up at 4:45 am this morning. and got home more than sixteen hours later. which is the age i will be turning on saturday.


-------------------------------------
archive. profile. notes. random.